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Real members of myHSteam have posted questions and answers that support our community guidelines, and should not be taken as medical advice. Looking for the latest medically reviewed content by doctors and experts? Visit our resource section.

Intimacy With Hs

A myHSteam Member asked a question 💭
Norwich, UK

Does anyone else not want to or be able to be intimate with there partner due to the pain of hs. Having hs stage 3 all over your body and the pain it causes plus not feeling sexy due to the way your skin looks/the smells they give off
I've just had a baby 12 weeks ago and my skin is so flared up! My doctor told me this would happen and I could either carry on with the pregnancy or abort, but no medication could be given whilst preggs. My skin feels like it's burning and I'm struggling to sit… read more

January 27, 2023
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A myHSteam Member

I honestly feel and understand what you are going through, but my husband of two years is very supportive when it comes to my condition. So when I had flare ups he helps with pain relief and helps with the kids and chores. Yes he in need of sex but he understands because he loves me. So I do other things to try to satisfy his needs. And depending on where the boils are, sometimes it's only right to suffer thru the pain.

January 27, 2023
A myHSteam Member

Intimacy with hidradenitis suppurativa (HS) can be challenging but manageable. Here are some key points from the knowledge base:

How HS Affects Intimacy
- Sexual Health and Emotional Well-Being: HS can impact sexual functioning, body image, and quality of life. Symptoms on the genitals or genital swelling can affect Show Full Answer

Intimacy with hidradenitis suppurativa (HS) can be challenging but manageable. Here are some key points from the knowledge base:

How HS Affects Intimacy:
- Sexual Health and Emotional Well-Being: HS can impact sexual functioning, body image, and quality of life. Symptoms on the genitals or genital swelling can affect sexual experiences.
- Sexual Desire and Functioning: Despite issues with functioning, many people with HS still report having sexual interest and desire.
- Gender Differences: HS is more common in women, but men often experience greater disease severity. Men with HS may have higher sexual dysfunction, while women may experience more sexual distress.

Mental Health and Connection:
- Emotional Challenges: Skin lesions and flare-ups can make emotional connections difficult, often leading to depression and anxiety.
- Grief and Body Image: Chronic health issues like HS can change how individuals view themselves and others, impacting their ability to connect sexually.

Communication Tips:
- Ease Into Conversations: Don’t feel pressured to share everything at once. Start with some explanation and gauge your partner's response.
- Explain Your Feelings: Let your partner know how HS affects you, including pain and discomfort during flare-ups.
- Focus on Sensory Experiences: Think about what kinds of touch or textures make you feel good and communicate this to your partner.

Practical Advice:
- Adjustments in Intimacy: Consider different ways to be intimate that avoid painful areas during flare-ups.
- Partner’s Perspective: Remember that your partner’s experience and perception of your condition may differ from your own. Leave space for their feelings and experiences.

Encouragement:
- Positive Outlook: One myHSteam member shared that dating and intimacy with HS is an adjustment, not an end. There are people who will accept and love you despite HS.

For more detailed information, you can refer to the article "Intimacy and HS: Communicating With Partners" on myHSteam.

July 20

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